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Saturday, August 15

T's About To Spill: My Nervous Breakdown

Yes. I had one. Today, actually, during the Shieh Tournament. It was after a shank pass, and I was really angry with myself. Like, really, REALLY angry. I could feel my bottom lip trembling. I tried to hide it by frowning. It didn't work. By then, I was really pissed at myself for being close to tears. "Why couldn't I just suck it up and play?", I thought. We won a point, and I had to get out.

I went to the sidelines and cried. I literally sobbed. Then I laughed at myself, while I was crying. Then I sobbed some more. Then the whole gymnasium seemed to become an oven, and I was sweating real bad, so I had to stop.

We lost a point, and I went back in. Adrianne shanked, Raina tried to help, and I bumped it over. Successfully. Unfortunately, it turned out that my pass touched the curtain at the top of the gym, and we lost the set. We went outside and talked a bit. My parents then came out to bring me and my sister some food. When we went back inside, my dad asked me how I was, and I started bawling again. Then my whole family went back outside, where I cried for a good five minutes. Between sobs, I explained to my family why I wasn't fit to be in the varsity team, how bad I was, how Coach Cruz only compliments me because he only sees when I play good, how the whole varsity team passed better than me, and on and on and on. Dar, being her silly self, made me feel a bit better, and I felt good enough to go inside again.

I guess that's it. I'm outrageously emotional, and that makes me mad.

email:statified21@hotmail.com

Meet T'Mar:
Tami’s the name
Blogging’s the new game
Simon Sanchez is the school
Where sharks totally rule
Fourteen is the age,
The volleyball court is my cage
I also like to paddle,
And school, I can handle
Need I say more?
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